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N* was fabulous at the guitar, and a phenomenal singer to boot.He belted out love songs, strategically replacing certain words with “Kristin,” just in case there was any shadow of doubt that he was singing just for me.The Westerners often support these guys financially, buying all of the food and paying for lodging while in Indonesia, then sending money over every now and then after returning home.It’s so cheap for these women to buy a meal, a T-shirt, or pay for the room for the week, why not foot the bill in exchange for a good lover?Then there were the guys on Gili Trawangan who kept inviting me to hang out ‘upstairs’ with them, even offering me free drugs. Trying to wrap my head around it, I told a Western girlfriend who had been living in Indonesia for a while about all the odd things that had been happening.
He followed me back to the other side of the river saying he wanted to go ‘swimming.’ What was lost in translation is he really meant, ‘shower.’ In my room.
It’s insane to think about, but the wives are usually fully aware. To make the pressure even stronger, these guys have an important role in giving back to their communities as well.
Of course, like any trade where sex is on the table, the older they get, the harder it is to make money like they used to.
Though money isn’t directly exchanged for sex, they become kept men.
It seemed no different to me than some relationships between Thai women and Western men.